Contemplation.

So, the plan was to stay in SC for the summer. But why? It was to work. I have an amazing job where pay is around min of 50 in a shift, but it's more like 100 a shift, which is sweet. Here's the dilemma: Feel like I have no real friend here. They seem to just blow and shift with the wind. The only one who I can see being friends with for the long haul is Karen and possibly Nan. Man, I love everyone so much, but screw it up. I feel like they are all fair-weather friends. I miss my home friends; ie the ones who I know will always be there, always. Katie and I discussed our friendship one day last summer and decided... Its just too hard to break in a great/amazing old friend who will stand by you always, no matter what! Katie, I love you amiga. So here's the decision: I want to tell work I need to go home to help my nana, which is true, but I just want to be where things are real. It's like all the sudden, everyone changed and its not just them, but me too. There's so much family crap, and I cant explain it all to them, and honestly, they don't really care. The family stuff, I just want/need to be there, and it affects me everyday, whether I let on about it or not. Ok, I'm done, finished. Been in this weird mood lately where it seems as if everyone is angry or something. Honestly, maybe something is wrong with me. Maybe I piss people off to see who will actually stick around, who want it to last. Maybe not. I dono why I end up making everyone mad, but it happens. Argh. I'm done.
Things I want to do this summer:

1. Hang out at the beach more with Linds
2. See my Nanners more!
3. Figure out what happened between LA and I, and fix it, no matter what it takes
4. Spend the afternoons on a boat...
5. Lounge with a book and Katie at her pool
6. Cantlers... Need I say more?
7. Chill downtown Annapolis
8. Be with my Nana
9. Feel less like crap at all times
10. Return to the purpose of Life... Refocus my life back to Christ. Maybe that is what is causing all this turmoil!
    

Wonderful (catch the scarcasm)

Ok, so last night, great times. Actually, other than the first bar being really cool and the second having an old man and his son buy rounds of shots and games of pool... It was crap! Here's how it went down: I called Leigh-Ann earlier in the day and we all decided to go out and get a few drinks with Kristi. So they picked me up and brought a friend from their lil neighborhood, Daniel. In the car, they kept saying things like "if you get drunk and fall in the water, we aren't gonna help and you can swim home" "don't be belligerent tonight" and on and on. Maybe they just don't know that crap actually hurts. We all went to Ray's in Mt. Pleasant, which is amazingly cool. There's this upstairs part where you can sit on comfy sofas. That part was really fun. There was this awkward part where Kristi and Daniel left and Leigh-Ann and I were just there, and we basically sat in silence for like 10 min. So, we left and went to Tracy's in West Ashley. Very different from the other place. There was a really great cover band, they even played weezer off the green album! Random song that only real weezer fans know! Props for that. Then this older gentleman started buying us drinks and paying for our pool games. Haha, fun times. Well, I was doing much better and then we got lemon drops... Not only did it taste like crap but something happened and I couldn't see straight or anything. Whoa, not good. Well, see then it gets better. I told Leigh-Ann "I'm not as f-ing stupid as you think" and though it's what I felt there had to be a better way of saying it. Because now its prolly all crap again. No excuse Sir, no excuse Sir. It all sucks, because I miss them and they could care less. Honestly, I don't even know where it all went down or when. Just one day, I was the dispensable one. Lucky me.

Ucho. hahahaha

you scored as Darth Vader. Darth Vader 78% General Grievous 67% Padme Amidala 67% Anakin Skywalker 64% Clone Trooper 58% Yoda 56% Obi Wan Kenobi 53% C-3PO 50% R2-D2 50% Emperor Palpatine 44% Chewbacca 39% Mace Windu 39%

Ok, this quiz... hahahaha. I'm the evil darth vader. but on the upside... get to be the originator of "Luke, I am your father!" So its ok if I go around saying it for a few days! Also, though I'm 'evil' and went to the dark side with the disallusions of saving Paedmay (even though we all know I just wanted the power because "somethings wrong, I'm not the Jedi I'm supposed to be") there is still the question of my being the chosen one, which is pretty darn cool!!!