Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to my Nana... crap. I cant do this. Today sucks. I dono how it can be made better. I've been trying to be strong for mom, bc it has to suck more for her but its aweful! I miss her and think about her all the time. And no, I dont wana talk about it, and I just wanted to go iceskating and have fun w/no stress. But no, not even that could be possible. So screw it. Maybe I am crazy, You all think it anyway. Some of you write on my facebook wall about how good of friends we are? But isnt that crap? I mean, isnt it fake? You only want to be friends when its convienent. You basically said you're gonna drop me and forget everything once we graduate and you go away. So why even invest my time in that? You were one of my favorites, but I cant handle that. It's not how I operate. Today wasnt even supposed to be about that. It was supposed to be fun, to take my mind from everything that hurts too much to be real today. But whatever, why go have fun when it's just easier not to? So, for now I'm done. Bye